Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Who's Got the Funk...Rachel has the Funk...literally
Yup I'm in a funk. I woke up this morning crying because I didn't have anything to wear...I have a bad habit of buying the wrong clothes...you know clothes to wear going out or for the weekend and not enough for work.
So I started my day off crying, then had a physical therapy appointment. Can you believe when I was filling out the forms I couldn't remember my own phone number! Seriously, I had to call it from my cell phone and my voicemail picked up so I guess I got it right after all.
Then I got into work about 10:30 and worked through my lunch to make up for being late, not to mention I have a doctor appointment tomorrow and then I have to leave early on Thursday and 3 days next week for more physical therapy...so after not feeling pretty because of my outfit and then not being able to take a lunch I was feeling bummed.
Then as the day went on, daily life struggles etc I felt like I needed a good cry. You know the feeling for no reason just wanna let it out.
I have been a little overwhelmed the past few days...stressing about the party and wanting my hubby to have a good time. Not to mention cooking the food because I'm no cook and meanwhile Hubby is critiquing so I am feeling more pressure. I just want it to be great.
Then he has his friends in town so I of course take the back seat...I love his attention but I am really glad his friends are here but just kinda felt left out.
So with that feeling on Monday I let it all out and of course he thought I was crazy. I don't like ruts...we haven't kept up with our weekly happy hours and going out twice a month. I haven't gotten my hair done and it's way way way (did I say way?) overdue, I haven't gotten a pedicure...I haven't shopped in I don't know how long because I am really trying hard not to be selfish...the economy is in the crapper and I am right smack in the middle of it with my job and pardon my french...It sucks! And I don't feel pretty so I cried.
Zman called me on my way home and asked if I could pick up pizza for dinner; it was going to be me and the kids because Hubby was going out tonight with his friend who leaves tomorrow and I guess I sounded down in the dumps to Zman.
I called back to let him know I would get pizza after my first instinct was "you want me to stop" and hubby answered. He could tell something was wrong and I just cried...I let him know why because he kept asking and frankly I couldn't hide it.
He is my best friend and always knows when something is bothering me. He offered to spend tomorrow night going shopping and taking me to get a pedicure...but I still feel guilty about spending the money.
Has anyone else experienced this or should I just get my Welbutrin filled?