my obsessive compulsive disorder (AKA OCD). Yes I am the one who keeps saying in my head; is the door locked? I think I locked it? Did I lock it? Baby is the door locked? He replies "damn it Rachel with your OCD; the door is locked" "if you don't believe me, you get out of bed and check it". My reply "oh so our safety isn't important"..."fine I will check it". I have to, my head won't rest until I do.
I am also known for counting money numerous times (especially if I have a wad of $100's, cause that's how I roll) (kidding). My husband always makes fun and jokes "if you keep counting do you think the number will change" ... "uh yes, some could stick together". Or I balance my check book over and over because I think I may have hit a wrong key on the calculator and I could have more or less money than I actually do.
Another crazy quirk is I organize my clothes and shoes by color. I am crazy about this and sometimes organize my husbands side but he just throws stuff in; it doesn't bother me his looks like a mess as long as mine is neat and pretty. I do this to my daughters clothes too.
I also check on my 3 year old daughter about 15 times a night once I put her to bed; I still check to make sure she is breathing...that whole SIDS thing always freaked me out when my kids were younger and it's just a habit now.
When both my kids were toddlers I loved clean up time. I would show them where each toy needed to go and if it was put in the wrong spot I would say "no baby it goes here with the rest of the Little People toys". When my daughter is playing in her room I always have a habit of saying "ok when your done playing...put all your toys away" "k mommy" "make sure you put them back where they go" "k mommy". I'm not as bad...but I do help them organize. My son has grown to appreciate a clean room. He went to his friends house one day to play and came home and said "mom, there house is chaos"...I said "what do you mean". He replies "everything is all over the place, he had so much stuff in his room on the floor you couldn't see the carpet...I am glad we live in a clean house". I told him "so now you appreciate having a clean house right", he replied "yes I can relax and find stuff, our house is sooo nice". He is still a boy but cleaning his room is part of his chores and yes I have to remind him but he is good organizer. My little girl Love has to help clean, she loves it...and enjoys it and loves to help her daddy clean "daddy I help you cwean" "mommy I do the spray and help you".
I am not so bad that I have to vacuum a certain way so the lines go in one direction (but I do LOVE vacuum lines). I enjoy having the house to myself and cleaning...not obsessively cleaning but kinda...
When I was a child I would hand pick all the lint off my bedroom floor (you would think I would just vacuum it, hmmm or maybe I just did and missed some pieces). I remember my bed having boards underneath it; you know to hold the box spring in place. I would not leave my room until I counted the boards and recounted making sure all were still there...because you never know one could have fell off and then my bed would cave in (I know I know). My mom never had to tell me to clean my room because you could eat off the floor if you wanted to. I never understood why my friends were "grounded" for not cleaning their room. So one day I just made a mess of it so my mom would tell me to clean it...she about fell over when she saw it but it only lasted 1 hour because I couldn't stand it.
I have been prescribed medicine such as "Zoloft", "Prozac" and "Wellbutrin" all of which I never took; I just don't want to have a medicine that I have to take daily nor do I want it to alter my awesome, outgoing, eccentric personality (boy did that sound conceded). So if my nervousness or anxiety gets the better of me, I just take a Xanax to go to sleep and boy do I have a good night sleep.
Maybe this has to do with growing up and my mom and I would leave the house she kept asking "did I turn my curling iron off", "did I lock the front door", "did you see if the garage door shut all the way" and we would sometimes end up turning around to check.
So I learn to get better; somethings I just leave it alone and say frig it...but my clothes have to be organized and nobody touches my shoes!!! Nobody!!!!
Thanks MamaKat for the assignment...now what's my grade?
Showing posts with label Writers Workshop Wednesday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Writers Workshop Wednesday. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
How is life different for your children than when you were growing up?
I have fond memories of being a child and other not so fond. I don't think my parents did a bad job; I just don't think they had the right role models.
You see my dad's parents (my grandparents duh) weren't the type of parents who said "I love you". I don't remember seeing them be affectionate toward one another.
My mom was raised by her grandparents; she had a sister who had died shortly before she was born and her grandparents considered her a gift from god so they wanted to raise her. They took her in when she was 3 days old. Her dad was an alcoholic and her mom was obviously saddened by the loss of her child. It seemed I guess like what needed to be done. But in doing so my mom didn't have a close relationship with her mother. She had to share the attention with 8 kids in which her grandmother had. I am sure it wasn't easy. She didn't really see her mom during this time or growing up. It was only until her children were born (my brother and I) and were growing up did the relationship become close...and then she passed away. I won't go into the details of that but it was a very sad time for my mom.
Fast forward several years and now I am a mother of 2 beautiful children. At first my husband and I decided we were only going to have 1 child. We wanted that child to feel so loved and we wanted to focus all the attention on him...then he turned 5 and asked when his brother or sister was coming so we decided...let's have another. We didn't want to be selfish and have him as an only child; we wanted him to have someone to share life with. When she was born; we both said "What would we have done without her?", we kept thanking our son for his idea to have another child...now she is 3 and he is 9. We try to give them a better life than we had...as parents I think it's your duty to do this. You want your kids to succeed farther than you did, have a bigger house than you did, make more money, and travel to more places. We are honest with our kids; if they ask us a question we tell them the truth. As hard as it may be we sit them down and explain it.
As a parent I try to instill what is right and what is wrong...we fail at times who doesn't. I sit my son down (because at 9 he kinda gets it) and explain I make mistakes just like him, if I am not doing something right, please tell me. If you dont' feel loved...tell me. My husband and I make it a point to tell our children we love them every day, if not 10 times a day. We are constantly loving on them, kissing on them, hugging them...doing things we don't want to do. If we have to reschedule a planned outing because frankly we are tired; we are consumed with guilt and remember what it was like to be a kid and be told no...when you were really looking forward to something, so we suck it up and do it.
My husband isn't your typical husband, we share all the responsibilities 50/50. (except the cooking, he does it all). He tries to set a high standard of what my daughter deserves in a man. They are very close. Something my dad and I weren't when I was growing up. It makes me feel so good inside to see the two of them together.
We instill in our kids that we want them to be great parents; better than we are. We want them to do whatever they want in life and know no matter what happens, we are the 2 people in life who will never judge (except for grades...we only accept A's) and will always be there for them.
I think we have done a pretty great job thus far, my son is very close with his sister. They love each other, they sleep with each other, they laugh together and we are proud of what we have done...not to say it's not going to get harder; but we feel if we keep the same foundation our kids will thrive. We have had hard times believe me! My son understands that because we talk to him about it; we explain what is going on, how we are planning on fixing it, letting him understand our family is a team and will always be a TEAM. That is what we are trying to do differently with our kids.
Thanks MamaKat for the assignment.
You see my dad's parents (my grandparents duh) weren't the type of parents who said "I love you". I don't remember seeing them be affectionate toward one another.
My mom was raised by her grandparents; she had a sister who had died shortly before she was born and her grandparents considered her a gift from god so they wanted to raise her. They took her in when she was 3 days old. Her dad was an alcoholic and her mom was obviously saddened by the loss of her child. It seemed I guess like what needed to be done. But in doing so my mom didn't have a close relationship with her mother. She had to share the attention with 8 kids in which her grandmother had. I am sure it wasn't easy. She didn't really see her mom during this time or growing up. It was only until her children were born (my brother and I) and were growing up did the relationship become close...and then she passed away. I won't go into the details of that but it was a very sad time for my mom.
Fast forward several years and now I am a mother of 2 beautiful children. At first my husband and I decided we were only going to have 1 child. We wanted that child to feel so loved and we wanted to focus all the attention on him...then he turned 5 and asked when his brother or sister was coming so we decided...let's have another. We didn't want to be selfish and have him as an only child; we wanted him to have someone to share life with. When she was born; we both said "What would we have done without her?", we kept thanking our son for his idea to have another child...now she is 3 and he is 9. We try to give them a better life than we had...as parents I think it's your duty to do this. You want your kids to succeed farther than you did, have a bigger house than you did, make more money, and travel to more places. We are honest with our kids; if they ask us a question we tell them the truth. As hard as it may be we sit them down and explain it.
As a parent I try to instill what is right and what is wrong...we fail at times who doesn't. I sit my son down (because at 9 he kinda gets it) and explain I make mistakes just like him, if I am not doing something right, please tell me. If you dont' feel loved...tell me. My husband and I make it a point to tell our children we love them every day, if not 10 times a day. We are constantly loving on them, kissing on them, hugging them...doing things we don't want to do. If we have to reschedule a planned outing because frankly we are tired; we are consumed with guilt and remember what it was like to be a kid and be told no...when you were really looking forward to something, so we suck it up and do it.
My husband isn't your typical husband, we share all the responsibilities 50/50. (except the cooking, he does it all). He tries to set a high standard of what my daughter deserves in a man. They are very close. Something my dad and I weren't when I was growing up. It makes me feel so good inside to see the two of them together.
We instill in our kids that we want them to be great parents; better than we are. We want them to do whatever they want in life and know no matter what happens, we are the 2 people in life who will never judge (except for grades...we only accept A's) and will always be there for them.
I think we have done a pretty great job thus far, my son is very close with his sister. They love each other, they sleep with each other, they laugh together and we are proud of what we have done...not to say it's not going to get harder; but we feel if we keep the same foundation our kids will thrive. We have had hard times believe me! My son understands that because we talk to him about it; we explain what is going on, how we are planning on fixing it, letting him understand our family is a team and will always be a TEAM. That is what we are trying to do differently with our kids.
Thanks MamaKat for the assignment.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
I Wish I Could...
Sing...Yes I wish I could sing. I always have and always will. Before I turned 30 I would tease my husband and tell him I was going to try out for American Idol. He was supportive but more so supportive in the fact he didn't want me to be embarrassed let alone embarrass our family. But deep down inside I love singing. I think I sound good during our Playstation Rock Band sessions; well maybe because we have already had a few drinks.
I love how you can be driving home listening to the radio and you just hear that song that makes you feel all good inside; just makes you wanna dance.
Sooooo....since I can't sing, I figured I would start playing the piano. Yep I signed up. I start the 2nd week in September. Maybe once I actually learn "keys" I may be able to learn to sing and sing in tune...I know it's a long shot but we can dream right? Just think even if the singing thing doesn't work out; I can play the piano at Christmas time right? My son is also going to learn as well, that way we can start a band together. I will play piano and he will sing (because he actually does sound good).
Thanks MamaKat
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